Doug Johnson (Blue Skunk Blog) shares a link to a fascinating article entitled, "Embracing Confusion: What Leaders Do When They Don't Know What to Do." While you can read Doug's entry yourself, I found the article engaging because it reflects something that is SO true in my experience.

Rapid change is making confusion a defining feature of management in the 21st century. Paradoxically, the authors argue, leaders who accept their confusion can turn a perceived weakness into a resource for learning and effective action.
1. Embrace your confusion.
2. Assert your need to make sense.
3. Structure the interaction.
4. Listen reflectively and learn.
5. Openly process your effort to make sense.

My response to Doug's entry appears below...like most blog entries, it started out in his comment box and grew too large to leave there.

Thanks for sharing this, Doug. It's a great article. What's funny (for me) is that I still have to practice doing the recommended steps. By no means is my 'knee-jerk' reaction the right one. Instead, I have to take a step back in any conversation that results in confusion, and then come at it again.

What is helpful, though, is that I've learned a lot from being confused. Being open to what your feelings and reactions are telling you is powerful stuff. In the past, and when I'm not paying attention now, I'll suppress those feelings and reactions without realizing it...which then forces me to ask, what is it that allows me to suppress those feelings? What training did I get in life that enables me to suppress? What lessons did I miss out on by suppressing my reactions?

But "expression suppression" is evil in leadership roles. So, I have to on the one hand, Listen to what you're feeling and saying and share that. on the other, what are others saying and why is it similar/different from what you're experiencing?

However, I don't believe we need to focus on just the positive. We also have to embrace the negative and allow its expression. "Positive reactions" are certainly politically correct, but negative ones allow people to "put the skunk on the table" that would otherwise stink up implementation or simmer in the background. Patrick Lencioni certainly embraces this approach towards conflict...

...CEOs who go to great lengths to avoid conflict often do so believing that they are strengthening their teams by avoiding destructive disagreement. This is ironic, because what they are really doing is stifling productive conflict and pushing important issues that need to be resolved under the carpet where they will fester. Eventually, those unresolved issues transform into uglier and more personal discord when executives grow frustrated at what they perceive to be repeated problems.

and Robert Quinn (Deep Change) shares it as "owning your vulnerabilities."

Real change comes from our willingness to own our vulnerability, confess our failures, and acknowledge that many of our stories do not have a happy ending.

For example, if I have a negative reaction to a project implementation from my supervisor or another, suppress it, then that is the reaction others experience, but no one ever spoke up during planning, I have failed in my role. However, if i bring it forward, even if it seems like it's negative, it may 'free' or 'empower' others to share their reactions, then find a workaround or alternative solution to a legitimate issue.

I've even noticed my own reluctance in conversations online via this blog (e.g. Richard Stallman discussion, as well as a few others)...and this is with me trying to be transparent and aware of what I'm doing. You can most often see this when you read an email and you get a response that can be characterized as "fence-sitting." I'm tempted to go back and read all my posts and see which ones are "fence-sitting ones" and which ones are not. However, fence-sitting is certainly acceptable leadership behavior in K-12 schools...it's safe, and allows the "Supreme Leader" to make the decision.

It's only after reading Quinn and Lencioni that I see how poor a choice this is. While Doug Johnson ends his entry with this question:

What do you do when you just don't know what to do?

I'd like to ask, "How can we encourage our young adults to not be fence-sitters?" I have to tell you, that when I discussed this with my wife, we both observed that young adults who speak their mind tactfully and openly--irrespective of postive/negative statements, but neutral--advance quickly in organizations. Is this a true observation for you?

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Categories: Leadership, MGuhlin.net